Facebook used to be exemplary of a potentially Utopian universe; endless possibilities and exchanges of information to be had, while blurring the lines of global connectivity. Though the platform isn’t entirely Utopian based on the idea that you have to work within the confined site, the social implications thereof indicate a leniency towards unity.

Now, we must stage a funeral for the death of this age, as Facebook will be dismantling their diplomatic foundation, and removing their procedural voting process before implementing big changes. What will they do now? They’ll just…well, do it.

See, that’s the problem with handing over your keys…you never really know who’s going to drive away or if they’ll take care of your prized possession. Unfortunately, our keys have been taken away against our will – head bagged, zip-tied, and beaten bloody – leaving us with our pumps in our hands and nothing to gas up. The removal of this system doesn’t mean that tomorrow they’re going to make Facebook pink (what a nightmare that would be) but it does mean that disasters like the implementation of the much-hated ‘Timeline’ will not be left up to us anymore…but to the shareholders. What. A. Treat.

The worst part about it, other than the fields of people copying, pasting, and sharing worthless attempts at legal immunity over their status fields…maybe that is the worst part…Wait, no. The worst part about all of this, is the fact that Facebook is your crack. You can’t leave. You know you won’t. Just like the Hotel California, right?! “We are all just prisoners here, of our own device”. Ring a bell? Anyone? Oh, right, the Eagles make music with guitars. Pff. Old.

In Conclusion

Anyhow, Facebook is the most vicious cycle you could ask for. You love it, you hate it. You hate it, it hates you back. It’s a beast of its own that can’t be caged, and sadly we just need to deal with it – especially now that the Suits are calling the shots. And if you think fleeing for Google + is a good idea…it probably isn’t. At the end of the day, people won’t leave Facebook, no matter how hard they try. It’s too established, and you’ve all worked to hard on developing the perfect image for yourself.


image courtesy of jokeroo